他的輕狂留在 某一節車廂
地下鐵裡的風 比回憶還重
整座城市一直等著我
有一段感情還在漂泊

對他唯一遺憾 是分手那天
我奔騰的眼淚 都停不下來
若那一刻重來 我不哭
讓他知道我可以很好

我愛他 轟轟烈烈最瘋狂
我的夢 狠狠碎過卻不會忘
曾為他 相信明天就是未來
情節有多壞 都不肯醒來

我愛他 跌跌撞撞到絕望
我的心 深深傷過卻不會忘
我和他 不再屬于這個地方
最初的天堂 最終的荒唐*

如果還有遺憾 又怎麼樣呢
傷了痛了懂了 就能好了嗎
曾經依靠彼此的肩膀
如今各自在人海流浪

我愛他 轟轟烈烈最瘋狂
我的夢 狠狠碎過卻不會忘
逃不開 愛越深越互相傷害
越深的依賴 越多的空白
該怎麼去愛

如果還有遺憾 是分手那天
我奔騰的眼淚 都停不下來
若那一刻重來 我不哭
讓他知道我可以很好

:: 我愛他 :: 叮噹 ::

I know that I posted this song before but since i watching the show now..cant resist it!!! cos the song is so nice! hahahah (: But I have decided that I shall TRY to wait till there are more episodes before continuing with my watching if not will very 辛苦 cos I dont know what is going to happen and have to wait one whole week before I do!!! Anyway there are quite a few shows to catch now..so I am well entertained!! and perhaps I shld be watching KOREAN drama to improve my KOREAN instead!!!

***

According to my very smart and wise members, the pain that is under my right feet is called 鸡眼 and here is what the Wikipedia say about it:

雞眼主要原因是手足皮膚摩擦後生成的厚繭，醫學名稱為足蹠疣，為局部長期受到擠壓、摩擦，導致表皮增厚而形成的厚繭。通常見於足部，是足部局限性圓錐狀角質增生性損害。以患處表皮增生變厚角化，形狀像雞的眼睛，行走時受擠壓而疼痛(真的很痛好不好！）為主要表現。防治方法是經常清潔手足外皮，減除生成的繭。

病因
由於穿過緊或窄的鞋子，或足骨畸形，使高出的腳趾長期摩擦或受壓，造成氣血運行不暢，肌膚失養而發病。

另外有硬雞眼與軟雞眼的分別。足底骨頭凸出的部位若經常受到壓迫與摩擦，皮膚容易變厚角化而形成雞眼。尤其在第五趾外緣處易形成硬雞眼。在足趾縫間的骨頭凸出處太常相互摩擦，也會形成軟雞眼，好發在第四五趾縫間。會有疼痛感，嚴重一點則會有灼熱感。

So, I think that I better go and get some medicine from the Chinese medicinal hall tml when it is open, dont want it to worsen!! ):

***

Its been a crazy week!! It started with Monday's CF retreat at Changi Village at night, Tuesday Leaders Dinner, Wednesday dinner and watching 2012 with Ping (which gave me recurring nightmares about the end of times!! freaky!!), Thursday CG meeting, Friday (not alot of people) CG dinner cum Yanzhi bday celebration, Sat morning NYC Mentoring seminar, Service and dinner, Sunday S4 service and then going out and watching the Christmas Carol..all in all and fighting the insomnia monster!! Those people who wanna sleep should be able to sleep instead having to try so hard to get to sleep for the past week and then after getting yourself to sleep, you get lots of dreams that prevented you from sleeping well, where is the justice?!!

Oh wells, that aside, I think that I am not just feeling very physically tired but tired generally. Seriously, at times like that you really wished that there is someone that you can just pour everything out to and I guess that you will feel better after doing so.

There are a lot of things that people dont understand, we claim to understand each other, we claim to think that we know what someone else is thinking but the truth is, do we really know? In the attempt to protect and prevent ourselves from getting hurt or in an attempt to protect the people we love, we appear to be stronger and better than who we really are most of the time. No issue with that, as long as there is an outlet at the end of the day, pouring it all out. If all these are not poured out and dealt with, it became pent up and one day this person will just breakdown and throw in the towel and we see that once too often in the lives of the people around us.

Thing is God created us to be relational, no man is an island, yet there are many who build walls and make it seem like they are an island, truth is they have been hurt and they want to prevent themselves from getting hurt further. Who are the people whom you can bare your heart to? Treasure these people, there wouldnt be many who fall into this category.

I have this tendancy to grumble and voice out my emotions out loud, so I will make comments like "wah..so you think that you are the only one who is tired larh huh? dont want to do just say larh.." after hanging up a phone call to myself and perhaps the people who are around. Most of the times people dont know how to react and actually I dont need people to react. BUT I have learnt through the action of someone that I shld really refrain from doing that. There was this day when I was just venting out my thoughts and this person heard me (i am very sure of that, cos i mentioned the person's name and said..you know hor....) and he took up his earphone and plug it into his (or her, this is generic) ears and ignored me. I was RATHER offended and i thought to myself that I will never respect this person again, that was downright rude. Yes, there are many of us who will shut off, but an action like that, it kills friendships!

Usually after grumbling and mumbling to myself, I will just move on and still carry on with what I need to do. But that does not mean that thoughts are not going through my mind. and I think that I was born a pessimist, I will run through the worse posisble scenario and outcome in my mind- Maybe that is why I get all my dreams and nightmares!! Anyway, thinking makes me tired and perhaps, I dont really want to think about it. But anyhow, thanks to Rec Casey for sharing a word in season for my life at least.

This passage came to my mind when I was showering just now:

"Most assuredly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain. He who loves his life will lose it, and he who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. If anyone serves Me, let him follow Me; and where I am, there My servant will be also. If anyone serves Me, him My Father will honor."


ok..go ponder...blogging make me slpy..nights.

SCREAMS: YANZHI HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

1:30 AM ·